Finding a Sense of Belonging as an LGBTQ+ Student

Introduction

University is meant to be a place where all students can express themselves freely and connect with others who share similar backgrounds and experiences. However, this can be challenging if you identify with a community that faces discrimination.

Created by students, researchers, and professionals, this page is specifically designed to help LGBTQ+ students find their crowd at university.

Let's Go

Understanding Social Connection and Belonging in the LGBTQ+ Community

Although significant strides have been made to create more welcoming and positive environments on campuses for LGBTQ+ students, many queer students may still feel hesitant to share their experiences or disclose their identity [1]. Even within the queer community, some students—such as those who identify as bisexual or transgender—may face greater marginalization [1]. The inability to fully express oneself, coupled with concerns for one’s identity and safety, can present significant barriers to finding a sense of belonging at university. It can feel like you can never be fully transparent, holding back in conversations and situations where your identity might be revealed [2].

Research shows that queer students experience lower levels of belonging, safety, and happiness, as well as higher levels of anxiety at university compared to their heterosexual peers [3]. While this may seem discouraging, there are ways to address and improve issues of belonging and safety on a personal level.

Tell Me More

The Queer University Experience

Here, we discuss some challenges that queer students may face at university. While you may not have experienced all—or any—of these, they highlight how university life can be quite different for queer students.

  • Queer students may experience discrimination from teachers, peers, and staff members [2; 4]. This can manifest through the language used when talking to or about them, the failure to respect their pronouns and identity, and favouritism toward cis-heteronormative students over queer students.

  • In friendships with straight peers, queer students may feel pressured to rationalise their friends’ discriminatory or demeaning behaviour toward them or their community [5]. This can create a psychological burden, leading some to dismiss harmful remarks or behaviour to maintain harmony in the friendship [6].

  • Queer students may also face discrimination from within the queer community itself. For example, bisexual students are sometimes ostracized by gay and lesbian peers [7; 8]. Erasure can also occur, where certain identities and experiences are overlooked during queer events and discussions, leading to feelings of exclusion. Some students may feel they are “not queer enough” to be fully part of the community.

  • From a lack of gender-neutral bathrooms to limited opportunities for sharing and respecting pronouns, and being taught from a predominantly cis-heteronormative perspective, queer students often find themselves in spaces where they feel out of place.

  • As a result of these challenges, queer students may experience lower levels of wellbeing [9], belonging, and safety, along with higher levels of loneliness [3], binge drinking [10], and depression.

Understandably, reading this might paint a gloomy picture of what university could be like for you. However, our next section offers suggestions for making this journey more fulfilling and rewarding.

What Can I Do?

Building a Plan of Action

Quality friendships and a sense of belonging can offer protection against the negative experiences that queer students may face [11]. Research and student experiences suggest the following steps can help improve the sense of belonging for queer students:

  • To protect yourself from invalidating spaces and environments, it's important to build a community of friends who validate your identity and sense of self [12; 13]. This might mean being more selective about who you become friends with and "testing the waters" before feeling comfortable enough to confide in new people. There's often pressure to make friends as soon as you start university, but it's perfectly okay to take your time and trust the process. Poor, incompatible friendships can do more harm than good.

  • Having friends with shared experiences can help you feel seen and validated [13; 14]. Joining a queer student society allows you to connect with people who have intersectional identities similar to yours. Given the discrimination that can sometimes occur within queer communities, it’s important to attend taster sessions and talk to current or former members to get a sense of whether the society's environment is right for you.

  • If you don't feel welcome in societies or groups on campus, it’s perfectly fine to explore groups and events beyond the university [14]. These could include meetups, parties, and volunteering opportunities organised by queer charities and advocacy organisations. You can also use these events to seek any support you may need as a queer person or student. Many organisations also host online events, so you can join even if nothing is happening locally.

  • Many UK universities have dedicated teams and resources for queer students. This may include guidance on coming out to friends and family, staying safe on campus, handling conflict related to queerphobia, and navigating university life as a queer student.

Ask a Friend

Coming Out Stories - University of Nottingham: Students at University of Nottingham share their stories of coming out with their chair of the University LGBTQIA+ staff network. (Watch Time: 15 minutes)

Being LGBT at University - University of Lincoln: Luke shares their experience of being an LGBT student at university. (Watch Time: 3 minutes)

Student Vlog - Aston University: Nancy shares her LGBT story while studying at Aston University. (Watch Time: 4 minutes)

LGBT+ Students’ Experiences and Advice - University of Salford: LGBT+ students from the University of Salford share their university experience and give advice for new students. (Watch Time: 6 minutes)

Experiences as an Asexual Student: Zac shares his experience of being an asexual student at university. (Watch Time: 2 minutes)

LGBTQ+ Society Members on Podcast - University of Gloucestershire: University of Gloucestershire’s LGBTQ+ society members discuss their experiences of being queer at university in this hour-long podcast. (Watch Time: 1 hour)

Cherishing One’s Identity: Emily writes about the importance of cherishing and being proud of one’s identity. (Read Time: 3 minutes)

Finding a Support Network at University: Emily discusses their experience of navigating university life as an LGBT+ student and stress on the importance of finding a support network. (Read Time: 4 minutes)

Trans Mental Health at University: Shevek shares their experience of being transgender at university, focusing on the mental health aspect of their experience. (Read Time: 5 minutes)

Embracing One’s Bisexuality at University: Eilidh writes about her experience of embracing her bisexuality at university and coming out. (Read Time: 5 minutes)

Share Your Story: Help fellow students learn from your experiences and feel less alone. Contribute to Student Minds, the UK’s leading student mental health charity, and ensure your voice reaches those who need it most.

What Other Support Is Available?

  • Prepared by the NHS, this page details the mental health support available to LGBTQ+ individuals in England.

  • This organisation offers both online and offline group meets for young LGBT+ individuals.

  • They offer a series of resources for young LGBT individuals, including an online advocacy program for trans young people and a dedicated helpline. 

  • They provide a wide range of services to support lesbian, gay, bisexual, and trans people, with a series of resources on specific topics.

  • They provide guidance on exploring identity and offer many LGBT+ groups.

  • This charity provides young LGBT+ individuals with free, confidential, and independent support, if they are experiencing or worried about any form of abuse.

  • They offer services for trans, non-binary and gender questioning people to increase a sense of resilience.

  • They have social groups for trans, non-binary and questioning people, offering a safe, trans-led space to meet, socialize and support each other.

  • They offer a safe, welcoming, and inclusive space where LGBTQ+ young people can meet, socialize, and find the support they need.

  • The London LGBTQ+ Community Centre works with a network of groups from across the LGBTQ+ community. This includes hosting several regular groups.

  • Cara-Friend offers one to one support for young people who are or think they might be Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer or Questioning their sexuality and/or gender identity, but would prefer the opportunity to talk with an experienced LGBTQIA+ youth worker.

  • The charity has put together a series of useful contacts for LGBTQIA+ mental health.

  • This document lists specific resources and signposting for Black LGBTQ+ students.

Explore related topics:

Tensions and Conflict in Social Relationships
Making Friends

Help us improve:

Check out our webinars:

Check Out Our Sources:

  1. Bachmann, C., & Gooch, B. (2018). LGBT in Britain: University Report. https://www.stonewall.org.uk/system/files/lgbt_in_britain_universities_report.pdf

  2. Tetreault, P., Fette, R., Meidlinger, P.., & Hope, D. (2013). Perceptions of Campus Climate by Sexual Minorities. Journal of Homosexuality, 60(7), 947–964. https://doi.org/10.1080/00918369.2013.774874 

  3. Wilson, L., & Liss, M. (2020). Safety and belonging as explanations for mental health disparities among sexual minority college students. Psychology of Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity, 9(1). https://doi.org/10.1037/sgd0000421

  4. Evans, R., Nagoshi, J., Nagoshi, C., Wheeler, J., & Henderson, J. (2017). Voices from the stories untold: Lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, and queer college students’ experiences with campus climate. Journal of Gay & Lesbian Social Services, 29(4), 426–444. https://doi.org/10.1080/10538720.2018.1378144

  5. Ueno, K., & Gentile, H. (2015). Construction of status equality in friendships between gay, lesbian, and bisexual students and straight students in college. Sociological Perspectives, 58(3), 402–421. https://doi.org/10.1177/0731121415574105

  6. Greenland, K., Augoustinos, M., Andreouli, E., & Taulke-Johnson, R. (2019). Cross-group friendships, the irony of harmony, and the social construction of “discrimination.” Ethnic and Racial Studies, 43(7), 1169–1188. https://doi.org/10.1080/01419870.2019.1648845

  7. Copp, H., & Koehler, W. (2017). Peer attitudes toward LGBT-identified university students as mediated by demographic factors. Journal of Gay & Lesbian Mental Health, 21(4), 277–291. https://doi.org/10.1080/19359705.2017.1320697

  8. Liss, M., & Wilson, L. (2021). Mental health and general psychological processes among asexual, bisexual, and gay/lesbian college students in the United States. Psychology & Sexuality, 1–13. https://doi.org/10.1080/19419899.2021.1979634  

  9. Tilley, D., Kolodetsky, A., Cottrell, D., & Tilton, A. (2020). Correlates to increased risk of sexual assault and sexual harassment among LGBT+ university students. Journal of Forensic Nursing, 16(2), 63–72. https://doi.org/10.1097/jfn.0000000000000284 

  10. Baiocco, R., D’Alessio, M., & Laghi, F. (2010). Binge drinking among gay and lesbian youths: The role of internalised sexual stigma, self-disclosure, and individuals’ sense of connectedness to the gay community. Addictive Behaviors, 35(10), 896–899. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.addbeh.2010.06.004 

  11. Backhaus, I., Lipson, S., Fisher, L., Kawachi, I., & Pedrelli, P. (2019). Sexual assault, sense of belonging, depression and suicidality among LGBQ and heterosexual college students. Journal of American College Health, 69(4), 404–412. https://doi.org/10.1080/07448481.2019.1679155

  12. Akeem Modeste-James, & Chilaka, F. (2024). Black gay men in graduate education: A collaborative autoethnography of finding black queer joy. Genealogy, 8(1), 24–24. https://doi.org/10.3390/genealogy8010024  

  13. Duran, A. (2018). A photovoice phenomenological study exploring campus belonging for queer students of colour. Journal of Student Affairs Research and Practice, 56(2), 153–167. https://doi.org/10.1080/19496591.2018.1490308

  14. Morris, M. (2017). “Gay capital” in gay student friendship networks. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 35(9), 1183–1204. https://doi.org/10.1177/0265407517705737